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However, it is so lovely to have your mom’s support. I know it won’t get easier, and I just need to think of the amazing life I have here, and will have in the future and do my best to copy and live with it. It is very hard to make up my mind as leaving parents behind is very painful “everytime”. One thing I’ve learned is to stop doing things out of guilt. Making decisions based on guilt is a bad plan in the long run for me. It’s brutal making that decision – either way.
However, it can also be one of the most stressful times in your life depending on where you are moving to, who you are moving with and why you are moving in the first place. Those hole-in-the-wall places I mentioned above? There’s a good chance you’ll experience cuisine unlike anything you’ve had before – even within the United States. Every region has cultural dishes that aren’t served elsewhere. In the South, you can experience the joys of soul food. In Chicago, you have the deep dish pizza that isn’t the same outside the city, and there are so many foods you’ve probably never even heard of before.
#7 You’ll Open Your Mind to New Lifestyles and Traditions
Thing is my family do not support it and think we are moving for all of the wrong reasons which I dont agree with. It makes this move so much harder to make and we’ve been delaying it purely to keep them happy. The sense of guilt I have right now is just tearing me apart but I know this move is right for us.
If you have the opportunity to provide this experience for your child, I encourage you to read this article for more information about sending your child to study abroad. Studying abroad is often the first experience someone has with moving far away from home, even if it is temporary. Temporary can be a summer stint, a semester in another country, or in the case of some, fortunate or not, a full year to live abroad. Moving far away from home can seem unnatural, but it can also be quite rewarding.
Enjoy your new life
I had been talking about moving away for a decade before we did it. So they weren’t THAT surprised when we actually told them. They were, however, surprised that it was going to be Malaysia, instead of Costa Rica. We just ripped off that band-aid and told them flat out, but we didn’t tell my gramma right away which wasn’t fair.
However, we truly believe this experience of moving far away from home is better for everyone in the long run. Social media and the ease of taking photos also help a lot. Even if your child doesn’t call or Skype as much as you want, you can often find hints of their lives through their social media accounts. Holidays are probably the most challenging times when someone is not living at home. Advances in technology have made it a bit easier to handle being apart.
Truths You Learn About Life Only After Moving Away From Home
I’m stuck here because my 79-year-old Mother has no-one else, and my partner won’t come. And on the other side of those guilt waves is the pure joy that I have from my life in Penang. I’m very grateful that Malaysia has kicked Covid’s ass, and Penang has been virus-free for over a month. I’m thankful for the sun that greets me nearly every morning and the ocean breezes that come with it. I am fortunate to have such great new friends here who have become my extended family. Guilt and grief are certainly not my overwhelming feelings.
How do you balance your wants/joy around family time guilt? You know..the “are we crazy to miss out on time with our kids and grand kids? I wonder if we’ll be so very sorry years from now.
Take it one day at a time
All of these things can take a toll on your child living far away from home. There are many benefits to moving far away from home as an abroad student. We’ve learned first-hand how living abroad can benefit your child . Every time I moved, I used Linkedin to find a new job.
Like with all the others, there are good things about moving far away from home, the bad, and the in between. If opportunities or adventure causes your young family to set out far away from relatives, you can make the most of it by being aware of issues and preparing as best as possible. It can be a challenge celebrating milestones when extended family are far away. Transportation issue also may mean your child visits less often, and this can exacerbate depression, loneliness, and poor choices as mentioned before.
I don’t think I’ll live away from home forever though. I have to “reset” and build again every time I move to a new place. We found a girl on the app who lives nearby and she is great with dogs. We recently started using Rover and I’m really happy about it. It’s depressing but I think about my older family members and wonder if they’ll still be there when I move back someday.
Moving away is hard, whether you've done it before or it's your first move. The distance can be daunting, and your first day in a new city is always the hardest. The decision to move far away from home is a personal one and effects can be good or bad, as well as a balance in between. You can certainly strike a balance if you live far from home by maintaining consistent contact via technology and structuring your visits more frequently if you plan well.
No matter when the feelings emerge, however, it’s important to acknowledge them and accept them for what they are. There is no right or wrong way to feel about homesickness and no right or wrong time for it to appear. And just as you can’t control when it starts, don’t stress about trying to control when it goes away. We only go back once or twice a year now, and I’d struggle to even make that effort if not appreciated, or just expected of me.
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